Well, I don't usually put too personal of stuff on here, but this time I'm just kinda baffled that I'm gonna go against my norm. My gf broke up with me the other day. It's not that I'm mad she did. Honest. I loved her very much and still do, but she recently had a change of heart and felt that she couldn't handle a relationship at this point in her life.

Am I hurt? Of course. I honestly thought that she was the one. I believed with all my heart that we would get married someday. Truly. But that's not what got me. It was the fact that despite all I had done for her and for our relationship, and despite how much we had been through, she apparently felt that I was worth so little, that our relationship was worth so little that ending it wasn't even worth a phone call.

I got a txt.

She couldn't be more than friends and she didn't want to talk about it because I would try and change her mind.

I was expecting a phone call saying how the movie was, whether or not she got to her appointment on time, how things were going. Instead I got a text message saying goodbye.

We live 1200 miles away from each other. Yeah, it's hard. Nearly impossible to handle at times. But the times we shared together in person and on the phone were the best times of my life. I gave everything I had to offer. Everything. She was my world. My one and only. And yet to her, breaking up with me wasn't worth the breath in her lungs. Do I understand why she broke up with me? Yes. Am I mad that she did? No, as everyone has to decide whether a relationship is right for them or not. I just feel embarrassed. Embarrassed that the person I loved more than any other felt that my feelings were irrelevant. Worth little more than the rapid clicks of a keypad.

So as it stands, I'm not going to remove the photos I have up on here just because some have been favorited and I don't wish to delete deviations that other people enjoy, but they are going to be moved to my scraps. To keep them up seems almost like lying on my part. I just don't know anymore. I hate life for throwing this at me, I hate myself for letting my emotions be destroyed, and I hate the fact that I don't hate her.